Seven...

Kaylee celebrating with her friends for birthday #5 (2009)

 Seven is a big number in life in general. God created the the earth in seven days for those of us who believe in creation. For all of us who enjoy color, there are seven colors of the rainbow. For those of us who enjoy science there are seven base units for measuring and if you get three sevens while playing a slot machine you win the jackpot. This year though, the number seven is very special to me.

Seven years ago today I had been up all night sitting in a hospital bed doing what women know best. A bit of yelling, laughing, watching cooking shows, trying not to get annoyed from people and oh ya...HAVING A BABY!! Today, seven years ago I became a mom. One thing that no one can ever take away from me. I pushed every 2 minutes for 2.5 hours straight to be able to hold a five pound four ounce baby girl in my arms for the first time. I will never forget that night for as long as I will live. I couldn't believe what had happened, as if it was a dream. I do then remember looking up at this baby girl's adoptive mom and saying, "well mom what is her name?" She said, "How about Kaylee Rae?" And so be it...I was holding the cutest little Kaylee Rae in my arms. No one could even start to prepare me for the emotions that I would have with seeing her for the first time. You can read all the books and try to be prepared, but it is something that every woman who has given birth can only understand with out words.

I try to do something special each year when Kaylee's birthday comes around. Last year I blogged about how I was going to spend the day and so forth. Since I am doing the Daily Joys each day, I figured my blog should be something centered around that since Miss Kaylee's birthday is a joyous occasion!!

1. I cherish her hand drawn pictures, craft projects, and school photographs that are sent to me a couple times a year.
2. I see her on a yearly basis when I head home to Oregon.
3. I am loving how she gives me a call every so often to either wish me a good day or to tell me about her loosing a tooth at recess.
4. I can not ask 2 better people to raise my child!
5. I try and tell people in a positive way how adoption has affected my life
6. I have been blessed with some of the most amazing women who all share the same emotions I deal with on a yearly basis
7. I look forward to the many years to come and developing a close relationship with Kaylee as she gets older.

I am sure I could go on and on about mindless things...but I truly am loving her birthday this year. I hope that each birthday gets better!!!

Happy birthday my Lil Miss Kaylee!! 

I hope that you had a wonderful day!

Daily Joy Project 2011

A friend of mine from high school started a Daily Joy Project last year. It was so inspiring that I thought I would try it this year. Basically what she did was posted five positive things on her Facebook status near the end of the day about her day. It was something that I and other people looked forward to reading each evening. Since it is the new year, I figured I would try and do the same thing. I am hoping to post something each night, and there have been a few times that I have not posted anything only because I forgot!! You know, life happens and tends to get in the way.

To catch you all up on how I have been...here are the past several days just so that you can see what I am doing.

Sunday: Jan 23rd 

"Today's Joys: relaxing Sunday with not much going on, went grocery shopping before the after-church rush started, bought a new camera to replace the one that I broke last year, and picking the winning teams for both NFL playoff games tonight!!"

Saturday: Jan 22nd 

"Today's Joys: Another successful tea event, oil change for my car finally got done, the sun was out today despite the bitter cold temps, and ending the evening having dinner with some girl friends!" 

Thursday: Jan 21st 

"Today's Joys: My first call today ended up being around 20 minutes with the sweetest ladies who just needed her medication changed down to a tier 2, a tea house that i have been trying to get a hold of FINALLY got back to me, had amazing service when I went out to dinner with the husband, and TOMORROW'S FRIDAY!"

Now you get the idea of what I am doing. Since I have been posting these, my mom has noticed that I have a better outlook on life when she and I talk on the phone. I will admit that I was and can be a pretty negative person. I figured this would help fix the attitude and force me to think of at least a couple good things on a day that could be such a crappy one!! 


Now for today's joys! 

Monday: Jan 24th

"Had a quiet day at home even though I really felt yucky, I put a whole chicken in the slow cooker before going back to bed this morning and it turned out awesome, and in just once week until a special little girl in my life turns 7 years old!!"

New Phone!!!

Yesterday was the day I had been waiting for in a long time. It felt like Christmas as I knew I was finally getting what I have wanted for four weeks. Rob and I finally got our new phones that we ordered about a month ago. Which ones did we get?? We got the new HTC Incredible by Verizon.

Rob and I started talking about getting new phones sometime last year. We heard that Google was trying to buy some cell towers to offer their own cell service. Well that came and it never went, and so we were still sitting with our old phones. Then the latest craze of the smart phones and the androids started to appear on the market. Quite a few of my friends started getting these type of phones and so it was cool see what all of these different phones would do.

Right around my birthday we decided that we would get the Incredible. When we tried to go get one we realized that everyone was sold out and that we had to order them. When Rob made his first trailer load of stuff out to Ohio he checked with one of the Verizon stores and found that we still had to order them, so he went and put in an order for two phones.

This phone is very cool. Rob said, "You are basically holding a mini computer in your hands that just has a phone option." I laughed, but yet that is exactly what it is. It is fast, the picture is great, and it can sync to just about any email account. I just love it. I am still trying to get use to it, and I will tell ya...it is very addicting!!! The one thing that I will have to get really use to is using the touch screen.

Been a few days..

I know...I have fallen out of my habit of posting every day. But it is ok...at least I am telling myself that. I figured I would update you all on how things are going. Work was pretty slow this weekend, which was ok for me. Friday I worked the ticket drop and was sent home an hour early due to it being so slow. I was not going to protest as it was a Friday, I had no plans, and it was nice outside. Of course I was going to just go home, but the thought of being sent home an hour early is always a nice thought!! I am rarely sent home early since most of the time I am the closer in box office or in a different spot where I am the only one for the job at the time. Friday evening we went out to see if I could find some long sleeved gray tshirts. One of the two that I have ripped on the bathroom stall at work. I was not happy as it was a very comfy shirt!! Let me just say that I came home empty handed as most of the shops and stores have switched to the spring and summer clothing which normally does not include light wieght long sleeved shirts. If I did find some...they were shirts that I was not really looking for.

Saturday was spent getting ready for the Open House on Sunday. Rob steamed cleaned the carpets in a couple of the bedrooms while I worked on the kitchen, dusting, and dishes. I had to work Saturday evening and Rob ended up going to work with me to watch some movies. I was in box office which was not very busy again. Just a couple more weeks and I will be wishing it was slow like it is now. I don't mind the slowness as I tend to take a book with me to read on the downtimes.

Sunday morning we woke up and made the finishing touches to the house. We mopped the kitchen, washed up the extra dishes that had not been washed the day before, and made sure that all of our jarred candles that we have around the house were all lit. We tend to have four different candles through out the house that normally light on a daily basis. We will normally let them burn all day and then put them out just before we head to bed. It keeps the house smelling good, even with three dogs! When our agent came by, we left for a couple hours and ate lunch at On The Border. When we got back, our agent said that in the two hours he had three different interests come by the house. One of them was just someone being nosy, another one was a couple with their own agent, and then one was a couple who was renting and looking into buying. So we can only wait and see. We will probably do another open house in a couple of weeks. I need to put another ad on craigslist.org to let people know of our house. Sunday evening I had a little 3.5 hour shift in box office. It was kind of pointless to go in, but I was the closing box office person and so I had to go in. I like box office and so I didn't mind the short little shift.

Yesterday, Rob and I didn't do much. Sparky had a vet appointment as it is the season where he tends to develop hot spots. Sure enough he had a new spot in a new area and he was given a cortisone shot in addition to pills that he has to take twice a day for the next week. Poor dog! Rob and I also drove up to Cabela's to look at sleeping bags. We have thought about going tent camping and realized that we do not have sleeping bags! We don't need to spent too much on sleeping bags, and so we didn't find any at Cabela's. Figure it was good to at least look to see what they had. We stopped a mall on our way home and found the Harry & David store. I picked up some chocolate covered pretzels, chocolate mints, and a Parmesan flatbread. Then we stopped at Yankee Candle and picked up a couple new large candles since we had a coupon.

So as you can see...I have not had much to really report on. Today we are taking it easy here at home. I had a pretty good migrane last night and still don't feel fully back to myself, but better than yesterday indeed! Rob received notice yesterday that Minot State had chosen someone else for the professor position that he interviewed for. He is waiting on one more school to see what the have to say. We are hoping to hear back from them this week. At least that is what they told him last week, so we will see what happens.

Going home to the City I love!

In about 5 hours I will be boarding a plane that will be part one of two for my trip to Oregon. I am so excited and this trip is long over due. Ok...so it has not been a full year...but that is a very long time for me to be away from my beloved state. :) I will be home with my parents for about nine days. Well less than that since it takes pretty much a whole day to fly and all. I guess that is better than driving or taking the train which would consist of a week or so. Oye!! 

I am looking forward to this trip. Like I said in an earlier post about my trip...this will not be a trip to be driving all over the state or city and back to see as many people as I can. It is a time to just sit and breath. I can not wait to see some of my closest friends and family, as well as the beloved pacific coast. My mouth is watering now about the thought of having a grilled cheese sandwich at Mo's over in Lincoln City and some fresh salt water taffy. yummy...yummy!!

I hope to blog everyday and keep up on my blogging while I am away. :)

Taking a Break...

Yes, you read that correctly...I am taking a break. I need a break from a lot of stuff and I am going to take care of myself. I had a break down a couple weeks ago on the phone with my mom. Her response was, "It sounds like you need to start working on you rather than trying to be superwoman!" I guess I needed that "ok" from my mom to really sit and look at everything. So with that being said, I have done a few things already!

I have put my schooling on hold until Rob and I get to the new school. I just hated going down to Iona fully knowing that it was my last semester. I felt overwhelmed, over worked, and getting nothing out of what I was doing. "But Amy, you dropped our classes in only the second week of classes!" Yes...I know I did! I just couldn't do it anymore. My classmates were driving me nuts and when I was in class I was counting down the minutes until I was able to leave. "But Amy, what about your internship?!! You can not just up and leave something like that!" I feel awful that I left my internship. It was good for me to just cut ties from everything that was part of Iona. I am hoping that the hours that I put in will count when I transfer into the new Social Work program at the new school. "But Amy, by doing this you are going to be behind when you go to your next school." Yes I may be a little behind, but I will go in with a good GPA from the Social Work Program from Iona. I didn't want to continue the classes, do poorly and ruin my GPA. I am hoping to get down to school on Monday afternoon to officially drop my classes. I would have done it all when I was down on campus this past week, but due to a large rain & wind storm that came through the NY/CONN area over the last weekend, the Arts & Sciences building was closed due to having no power. If I do not get down to campus on Monday then it will have to wait until I get back from Oregon. 

Yes, that is the second thing I have done. The same night after I got off the phone with my mom, I booked a flight to Oregon. I leave on Tuesday (March 23rd) for nine days!!!! Yes, I am very excited to see my family, a few best friends, and of course Kaylee. It will be a week of relaxation, rejuvenation, and evaluation. This trip will not be me driving all over the place every day to try and fit everyone in before I leave. I have kept my trip on the "DL" as I didn't want to fill up the week and running myself ragged when that is not what the trip was intended for. 

Another thing that I did is started searching for a counselor that I can talk to on a weekly basis. I am hoping to find one that is covered my insurance so that I am not paying out of pocket. I was hoping to call a few people this past week, but time got a head of me, I guess. 

So this is me. I am here to take care of me...and if you don't like it...well tough. My social work professors have all said, "You have to take care of you, before you can help someone else." I have heard that from other people as well, and so now I am getting off the train and doing what I need to do.

Getting a cold...

yup...that's right...I think Rob and I are coming down with colds. Oh I love how the weather is changing...but I hate how my body reacts.

So this posting will be short as I have a headache and probably should go to bed. I hope that my readers are feeling ok!!!

All packed...

Yes, you read that correctly! I am all packed and ready to go. Rob and I are heading out in the morning for Minneapolis, MN. I am excited to get away for the weekend. Rob has an interview on Friday and so I will spend the day just relaxing and literally taking a personal day. I know that I sure need one!!

Tomorrow evening though will consist of having dinner with some of the people from the college. I am excited because dinner will be at The Old Spaghetti Factory, but yet nervous because even though it is just dinner it is a low key part of the interview process.

Saturday will be spent at Mall of America! Shopping here I come! I need another pair of jeans...so this is just perfect. :)

Sunday we will be flying back home. So yes it is a quick trip...but one that is well needed in a way for both of us.

Home movies

Last night, Rob and I spent quite a bit of time going through our video clips that were recorded from our digital camera. I am bad about transferring the clips over to the correct folder when I off load the pictures and videos from the camera after getting home from a trip or anything else. So last night was a time that we sat and renamed all the files for the videos.

I got to thinking that when I was a kid when we would want to watch something that we had recorded we had to dig out the video cassette tape that was labeled with what we wanted. Then I thought how kids today will just go to the family computer or television media center to find the videos they wanted to watch.

Rob and I got to laughing at some of the clips that we watched last night. Some were, "Why did you video that?!" or "I am so glad that I got that on video!" I thought I would share you a few. Enjoy!

Tomorrow is March

Well tomorrow will mark the first day of March. I thought I would spend today with saying what the theme for the NaBloPoMo for March. I got an email yesterday announcing what the theme is and how one may look at it.

The theme for next month's 31-day blogging challenge is STRANGE(R). All kinds of oddities are up for your blogular examination. (Have you seen this octopus video, for example?) If strange doesn't strike your fancy, remember the old saying, "Strangers are just friends we haven't met yet"--there are billions of them on the other side of your door, maybe one (or thirty-one) of them is worth a look?

So I will try and write on this one. I didn't write on this past months. I kind of forgot about it.

Happy Saturday...

hello to all of you. hopefully you are having or have had a good saturday. I had to work which is nothing special. It was pretty slow for the morning and did pick up slightly...but it just seemed to drag on for quite awhile. I had the oppertunity to watch the movie Precious, but I didn't take up on it as Rob went to work with me today and so I would have had to arrange for someone to let our dogs out to pee because we would have been away from the house way too long. I heard though Precious is coming to dvd on March 9th. So I will wait then and rent it. I have heard mixed reviews on it and how it has a sad ending, but I still want to see it.

Hard to believe that tomorrow will be the last day of this month!! Where did the time go?? I am looking forward to March though. I am thinking March will be a good month. Monday, Sparky-dog turns 9 years old. What an old dog. He will be pampered with a trip to McDonald's or some place for lunch, then a trip to the park (weather permitting), then a trip to PetsMart, and then dinner out somewhere as well. Yes we treat our dogs as if they were children. We will have to find a small cake for him as well. haha In addition to Monday being Sparky's birthday, Monday is "HAPPY AMY DAY!" What is this day?? Well it marks the monthly anniversary since Rob and I were matched on Eharmony. This was all Rob's idea. So I will be taken out with Sparky to do all things Sparky does, too. No....ok...maybe not exactly all of that...but I get to pick the places that we go and where we eat. :) Rob has a phone interview on Tuesday (March 2nd) with  Minot State University which is located way way up in Minot, North Dakota. Yes people do live way up there. haha. Tuesday also marks the first day of Spring Trimester for Iona. It will be my last term at Iona. We also have a campus interview in the middle of March up in Minneapolis, MN and by the sounds of it, Rob may have a campus interview at Cleveland State as well if the cards keep playing like they are.

So that is me...hope you are well, too. :)

short posting

Tonight will be a short posting. I don't have much to say...but wanted to get a daily blog in since I have been blogging everyday since the first of January. Good for me, as I would say. It is sometimes difficult to sit down after a busy day or during a busy day to post a blog. Sometimes like tonight I just feel like i don't have much to say.

So how was my day? It started out a bit slow as I didn't sleep well last night. We had to move out all the bed and furniture stuff in our bedroom last night since the carpet guys were coming today to put in the new carpet. "But you are selling the house, amy...why put new carpet in?" Well we had to put new carpet in just that room because it was pretty stained (from the previous home owner) and casey (our youngest dog) dug probably a square foot of carpet up last year during a party that we held at our house. we had locked the dogs all in different bedrooms, and found out that casey has some anxiety issues. So we had to take care of that. :)

I went to the dentist office today as well. It was my last appointment for fillings!!! as of now, I have no new cavities!! yay!! So as much as I hate going to the dentist...this appointment was a good one. It only took me three years to fill or pull all of my troubled teeth. I do need to get my wisdom teeth taken care of...but they are not causing me pain...so they will be left alone for the time being. 

I was suppose to go down to class tonight...but because of the crappy weather, I opted to stay home. since i was home, rob and i did a date night. We went to dinner, the a different place for dessert and then over to the theatre to watch the new Jeff Bridges movie, "Crazy Heart." I liked it!! It is slow...but I still liked it. I will say that it is not a movie for everyone. Kind of like the movie last year called Gran Torino. 

So now we are home and I am typing out this blog before it hits midnight at my house. I hope that you had a good day, too.

So where are we??

It has been about a month now and I thought I would update my readers on how everything is going with Rob's job hunt and everything. Click here to refresh your memory on the schools that Rob has applied to. Out of the listed schools, Rob has had phone interview with Belmont University and Augsburg College. He will have a phone interview with Black Hills State University which is located in an itty bitty town on the South Dakota/Wyoming border. It is a pretty good school, and I look forward to hearing what Rob tells me about what he finds out on Wednesday. In addition to the phone interview with Augsburg he has also had a written interview with them. Belmont and Augsburg both seemed very impressed with Rob's accomplishments with in the past couple of years while working at Iona. Out of the two schools that he has interviewed with so far Augsburg is the last one he really wants as of right now. He said that there is quite a bit of politics between the administration and the business school. He is not too sure if he wants to deal with that again as that is what he has to deal with at Iona as well. In addition to that, he said that the cost of living between MN and here in CT is not much less. He was playing around with the cost of living calculator a couple nights ago and figured out that he would have to be making about one percent more than what he is making now over in MN for us to live at the same level we are now. Augsburg is wanting to pay quite a bit lower as well. Now don't get me wrong...if Augsburg is the one who offers a job then yes...we will take it. It would just be nice to find a place where we are not moving every three to four years.

Last week our house was officially listed on the market. You can view our ad here at this link: http://www.trulia.com/property/1039724104-77-Grove-Ave-Derby-CT-06418. Tomorrow will be an "Agents Open House". Our agent likes to have all of his co-workers come through the house to get familiar with what our house looks like and some of the special features. That way if they are in the office answering phones and our own agent is not they will be able to know some details about the property. I am hoping we can get moving on the house. In a couple of weeks, there will be a public open house, as well. Maybe just maybe someone will like what they see!!

So that is where we are on everything right now. Keep praying that everything runs smoothly, that Rob will get some good interviews, and at least one job offer to choose from, and that our house will sell in a timely manner!!

Feeling unproductive today

I am not feeling 100% today which is a bad thing. I have to complete that psychology disorders paper today since it is due tomorrow. *sigh* I had to go to the urgent care this morning to get meds for yet another bladder infection. I hate feeling crappy on days like today when I have so much other stuff to be doing.

On the note of the paper...i would normally be done with it by now. For some reason though this paper has been extremely difficult to write. the stuff i have written down just seems jumbled. thank goodness it is only a five paged double spaced paper...but this is like pulling teeth for me right now. anyone want to write it for me?? no...i am just kidding. I will write it, turn it in and hope for a reasonable grade...even if that would be a "B".

not much else to report today. i had a social work junior field placement orientation yesterday. i think i would have rather put needles in my eyes only because i have been with my internship for about a month now. oh well...it is part of the class and so that is what is required for me to do.

Anniversary of Relinquishment

When one thinks of the word "Relinquishment" what comes to mind?? Webster's dictionary defines this word as:  

"1. To retire from; give up or abandon. 2. To put aside or desist from (something practiced, professed, or intended). 3. To let go; surrender. 4. To cease holding physically; release." 

Funny how this word does not mean to give a better life. I hate how harsh this word is and how final it is. I hate every part of this word...but yet it is a word that is part of the adoption world. One that is talked about but yet the reality of this word does not take place until a small infant is laying in a woman's arms. If I could do one thing for the adoption world...it would be to replace this word for something different. I am not too sure what other word to use...but I would definitely change it. 

Six years ago today this word was very real in my life. I had spoken to my adoption counselor weeks before I went into labor about what this day would be like, but yet no adoption counselor could really fully prepare me for the intense emotions I would feel. Six years ago today would have been a Monday. Chilly but sunny outside in Oregon. My mom had stayed with me at the hospital over night. It was the last night that I could hear Kaylee's cries for feeding, a diaper change, or the comfort of just wanting to be held. About 7am, mom said it was time to start the day. We got dressed, and took some very teary pictures as the emotions were so overwhelming. I just wished that I could freeze time and just stay in that hospital room forever. But I knew that could not happen. Around 10am, people started arriving: such as my adoption counselor, Darrin & NaeDean, Scott, and my dad. We took some more pictures and Scott's mom was able to see Kaylee for the first time. About 11am was when the realization of the papers had to be signed. Everyone left the room except my parents, Kaylee, myself and my adoption counselor. She pulled out the very papers that she and I had read a couple weeks before to start the relinquishment process. The words on the page that she read come through as if I was sitting in Charlie Brown's classroom listening to his teacher. Then Amy would ask me if I understood and I said yes. One paper signed. Next sheet of paper the same process. While she was reading I was holding Kaylee with tears streaming down my face as if someone had left the bathroom facet on. I signed yet another paper saying that I was giving up my rights as a natural mother and would not show up at any court dates to fight what I had signed. Then it was over. The papers were signed, notarized and there they sat, just so final.

After the signing, Amy (my adoption counselor) gave parents and I some time alone with Kaylee. The three of us sat and just cried...but we all knew it was the best thing we could have done. I was 23 at the time with no job, no medical insurance, and no way to care for Kaylee at the level of what I wanted. I knew I had done the right thing. A few minutes later after some more tears and prayers, the whole crew came back in. We sat and said good thoughts about what we wanted for Kaylee. Scott even got choked up which was a sign for me that he had emotion for what was going on. Darrin & NaeDean gave me a little heart shaped locket with a picture of myself and Kaylee. On the back of the locket the name "lil miss" was engraved as that is what we called Kaylee until she was born. 

The first couple of days after the signing were probably some of the hardest days that I have ever experienced. I was dealing with emotions I had never felt before in addition to every biological aspect of what goes one after a woman gives birth. I cried and Fred (the family cat) tried to comfort me the best he knew how. He would lay in my lap and just purr.

A couple days later I was talking with another birthmom friend online. She had asked me how I was doing and I told her that I was ok, I guess. She said, "you probably feel like someone stuck a knife in your back, slowly turning it, and also patting you on the back saying, "You are strong and did the right thing.'" This is exactly how I felt!! I can not express to you the very emotion that was in that hospital room that day. It was one of those moments where you "just had to be there." 

I found a poem that I hold very deeply in my heart. I tend to read it every year on this day as it is very fitting for a day like today. 

Legacy of An Adopted Child

Author Unknown

Once there were two women,

Who barely knew each other.

One is in your heart forever,

The other you’ll call mother.

Two different lives,

Shaped to make yours one.

One became your guiding star,

The other became your sun.

The first gave you life,

And the second taught you how to live it.

The first gave you a need for love,

And the second was there to give it.

One gave you a nationality,

The other gave you a name.
One gave you the seed of talent,

The other gave you an aim.

One gave you emotions,

The other calmed your fears.

One saw your first sweet smile,

The other dried your tears.

One gave you a family,

It was what God intended for her to do.

The other prayed for a child,

And God led her straight to you.

And now you ask me

Through your tears,

The age old question through the years.

Heredity or environment…

Which are you a product of?

Neither, my darling… neither,

Just two different kinds of love.

Feb. theme for NaBloPoMo.com

Since I posted everyday this month for January I thought I would try and do it again. :) February's theme for NaBloPoMo.com is called Ties. While I may not post everyday abut this subject, I will try and have a few posts on this. Here is Feb's badge. :)

Kaylee, Happy 6th Birthday!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY LIL MISS KAYLEE!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!

Six years ago today a little 5lb 4oz girl was born and placed into my arms. That day was one of the greatest day of my life. I can not believe that just six years ago she was born. It really feels as if it was yesterday!!! Today is bittersweet for me now though. I love birthday but then my mind wanders over to the "Well look what you have missed! Look what you could have had!" I then remind myself of what she has done in the past six years and what I have done in the past six years.

For her birthday this year, I actually put her gift in the mail BEFORE her birthday. That is pretty good for me! The past couple of years I have sent her stuff late and it was more of a valentine's day gift or even late as an Easter gift. So this year I was determined to get the stuff in the mail early. What did I get her?? She is still really into Princess stuff, and was having a Princess themed birthday party. I got her a $15 Target gift card, a Princess & the Frog coloring book (she loves to draw and color), and a Disney Princess reading book. With out even thinking until I got home I looked and the gift card that I picked out was in the shape of the frog...so it goes with the whole Princess theme. :) I sent her at Christmas time a Target gift card as well and she loved it, because she got to pick out stuff with money. It was cute to hear what she bought. Yes it was barbie princess stuff. :)

Today I will go and have breakfast at Chips and get the birthday pancakes. Then I will have to come home and work on a Psych. paper that I have been putting off way too long. Hopefully dinner I will be able to try a new Japenese place that I have not tried yet. So I will make it a good day. I wanted to leave you with a poem that a birthmom friend wrote a couple years ago when her own birthdaughter had a birthday. She is not the only one who feels the way she does in the poem.

Birthday Pain

By: Krissy Mitchell
Birthmommy to Rylee Renee
My baby girl turns four today
My heart is aching
There is so much pain
Just four short years ago
I held her in my arms
I was her "Mommy"
Her very First
I was the first to kiss
Her soft little head
To cuddle her close
To my heart so dead
Tears would drip
On her little face so pure
How can I let go of
My daughter so dear
Four years gone by
My heart is still numb
I think of that day
When I was her "First Mom"
 

Sisterchicks Book Series

Anyone heard of this series?? Well I can thank my mom for getting me hooked to one of the best and funniest friendship book christian series around!! The series is written by a Christian author named Robin Jones Gunn. If you do not know who she is then look her up. She has written all type of books for middle school aged girls, high school girls, young college aged girls, and now a series for women who are are out of college.

The Sisterchicks series is basically a bunch of books that can be read in any order. They are about two girlfriends *which sometimes are sisters* (different characters in each book) embarking on a new adventure. I have close to all of the books except for probably the couple latest ones. These books will make you laugh, cry, and fall in love all over again. Every woman would enjoy this book series as there is something in there for everyone.

I will leave you with this from Robin Jones Gunn:
"Sisterchick: Noun: A friend who shares the deepest wonders of your heart, loves you like a sister, and provides a reality check when you're being a brat."

Hats

 I woke up this morning to pouring rain and massive wind. I figured I would just wear a hat today due to such crappy weather. Why would I take the time to do my hair when it is just going to be ruined the second I step outside to go to the car? So a hat it was for today. I have many hats. Two pink ballcap, a white ball cap, a green ballcap, then a straw hat from my trip to TN, and then two stocking caps. Yes, I think I have an over abundance of hats. But shh...they all have their purpose. Over just the past couple of years I have been wearing hats more often. I never thought I would be a person who would wear a hat as often as I do now. I now understand the purpose of having them. :) To either block the sun on a bright day, to hide a bad hair day, or to make a statement.

In life we all wear hats, as well. We all have many different hats that we put on from the time we get out of bed until the time we crawl back into bed. I felt that way today. I woke up and put my "intern" hat on and headed down for a two hour internship shift. After that I put my "dentist patient" hat on to get three cavities filled, then I went home and put my "student/wife" hats on as I was home to finish up some homework and print out everything for class. An hour later I was leaving the house again with only my "student" hat on as class was from 5:30pm-8pm tonight. I have other hats though. Like the "birthmother" hat which is a constant reminder since Kaylee's birthday is on Sunday. Another hat that I have is the "daughter" hat. It is Monday and I normally call my mom on the phone either Sunday or Monday evenings. It is almost 10pm and I have yet to pick up the phone to check in with my mom. It has been a crazy day though. I then have my "work" hat that I put on when I am at the theatre. I could go on and say I have a "sister" hat or a "friend" hat.

As you can see I have a lot of hats, but if you think about where you are...you may have more hats than me.

Best Book?

As I start to think about packing up my stuff into moving boxes I keep looking over at my two book cases full of books. I think, "I really should donate some of these books...but they were too good to give up!" So I got to thinking...what were some of the best books I have read in the past??

I love the O'Malley Series written by Dee Henderson. The series is about seven abandaned or orphaned teens who group together to create their own family. As adults they all are still very close like a family but each one is in a different line of work. One is a firefighter, another one works as a CSI type of job, and so on. Each book has some mild romance along with a pretty good intense mystery plot. I have read almost all of them. I think I have one more to go. I did not read them in order, but it does help to read them in order only because relationships develop in each book that carry on into the following book.

Another series that I have enjoyed is called Annie's People written by Beverly Lewis. It is about an Amish girl who meets an English (non Amish) boy and falls in love. The series is the whole tie of what will she do? Stay with the Amish Community or leave to be banished for life. This series is one that has to be read in order otherwise one would be confused.

If you like the Amish type of romance series you need to check out a series written by Cindy Woodsmall. The series is called Sisters of the Quilt. I picked up the first book when I was living in Tucson. I am not a fast reader and I think I read the first book in close to 2-3 days. I was just shocked of how awesome it is. I then went out to see if I could get the second book only to find out that the second book would not be released until November of that year!!! I had to actually wait for the book to come out. The first book sets the story of an Amish girl who secretly gets engaged to a Menonite boy. On her way home one day from the place that she worked...she was pulled into a car and raped by a stranger. She became pregnant by this pregnancy. She was accused of lying and anything else. The book and the other two in the series are an adrenaline rush. This is another series that must be read in order. 

An excellent book that is not part of a series is called Redeeming Love written by Francine Rivers. A friend of mine gave me this book as a gift after the placement of Kaylee. She said that she had read this book several times and thought that I would enjoy the book just as much as she. It is about a man who takes in a prostitute back in the old western days. It is the struggle of learning to live together and her learning how to live on a farm. Kind of reminded me of the book Sarah, Plain & Tall.